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But never at will and never for long. Then the strangest thing happened It's hard to explain. It's like there's a modem attached to my brain. I'm downloading songs without having to think. Like they're written in pure biochemical ink. "Open your mind, let the thoughts come aboard!" says the octopus stuck to my satellite switchboard. - C. E. Anderson So my last journal entry spawned some serious commentary. I like that. I'd also like to go on record that this is all rooted in science. Basic quantum physics, to be specific. What I have learned is so amazing that I feel almost guilty for possessing the knowledge, considering the historic roster of geniuses that missed out on it entirely, but actually deserved to know... when I only wanted to know. FACT: We can influence changes in the world around us by simple observation and conscious thought. In other words, when focused properly, our imaginations are capable of co-creating this reality as it unfolds before our eyes. And if we control our imaginations, we create our realities. It's like lucid dreaming... my first real addiction. When I was a kid, I could hardly wait for bedtime, because that's when the fun began. Sleep held my backstage pass to the mysterious interdimensional labyrinth of infinite possibilities. I could pop in and out of interwoven planes of existence, doing what kids do best: flying, vanquishing monsters, molding time and space, and experiencing the grandest and most awesome natural wonders of uninhabited planets... including earth, just not the one you're living on. I mastered the art of lucid dreaming in a sleeping state, but that was only the beginning. At first it was only a hunch. Eight year olds don't know about quantum physics, after all, especially back when I was eight. Everyone, instead, went out of the way to distinguish the sleeping world of dreams from the "real" world of jobs and taxes and traffic and second opinions. But my instincts told me these two seemingly separate words were like the top and bottom halves of a fraction; and none was more real than the other, because to look at them independently was to take them out of context. Only I wouldn't have said it like that at eight. But I believed it to be true. So the next step seemed obvious: if I can manifest reality on this side of the fraction, I can manifest it on the other side as well. But how? And this is where it seemed complicated. Did the manifestations in my dreams have tangible equivalents on the other side of the fraction bar? Or was this like a cosmic playground, a rehearsal stage, if you will, for the evolving god? I thought about infinity and could come to no conclusion. And then something happened. Something I'm ashamed of. I began to forget. I forgot the way I rose up out of my body like a helium balloon and saw myself dead, over and over in lives that flitted by like single processes in a much larger script. I forgot the feeling of freedom that exists outside of matter, when we were perfect musical pitches in the symphony of eternity. I forgot the inexplicable ecstasy of unlocking the very first thought, and the blinding awe of light being born. I forgot the insatiable desire to follow the light, unlocking every hidden door in the fabric of eternity in pursuit of it. I forgot the inexplicable exhiliration of taking form to contain it. My sense of self diminished as the thoughts I had loosed multiplied exponentially, breaking the light into smaller and smaller fractions, and taking the truth with it, until all that was left of Our Light was the sparkle in your eyes. Do you feel me? I forgot the way the earth looked before we got here, before you got here. I forgot what I was looking for. What I was doing here. Where I was going. Trekking through pain and fear and regret, I've been TRYING for years to manifest reality, but I wasn't sure if I was making things come true or if it was just coincidence. It was that little shred of doubt that was holding me back. Finally I watched a movie, and I shit you not, this film has absolutely changed my life. It's flipped my entire concept reality inside-out and upside-down, and I'm happier than I can ever remember being, because I finally understand how we can create our own destinies! The film is called "What the Bleep Do We Know?" and it's the coolest flick on quantum physics I've ever seen. It's pretty heady stuff for a first time quantum physician in training, but if you know the basics, this is the elevator to the higher level. I've been an amateur scholar of quantum mechanics and chaos theory for years now, and while I understood the math and mechanics of it all, I was missing the big picture. Quantum physics is not just about possibilities, it's about infinite possibilities. Once you swallow the concept of infinity, you realize there is a possibility out there for everything and every combination of things you can possibly imagine. Since quantum physics shows that the behavior of an object is affected by the presence of an observer, we can become the observer, using our own thoughts to influence the behavior of the world around us. By imagining something, we can call the very possibility itself into existence... and by completely believing in the possibility, and acting in accordance with that belief, we can walk through it, right to the other side where it's always been that way. In other words, we have the power to make things happen, to will things into patterns of behavior, and even into existence. We have the power to manifest reality itself! All we have to do is believe. Sure, I'd heard it a thousand times before: "If you can imagine it, you can do it." But I never let it sink in; I never really believed. Yeah, I thought, of course you can do anything... if you have enough money, and the right daddy, and all the right friends with all the right jobs, and tons of good luck and perfect timing... and on and on and on. But those were just excuses I made because I was too scared to command my own imagination. I was scared of mom, scared of god, scared of being wrong. Instead of telling my mind what to believe, I let other people's thoughts tell my mind what to believe, then I let my own imagination get the better of me. I let it freak me out. I let it control me. But not anymore. I am the master of my destiny, the captain of a fleet of possibilities. And the best part is that this is not a bunch of psychobabble or fanatical religious mumbo-jumbo; it's science. And it's telling us that this reality we live in, with all its rules and boundaries and limitations, is just one possible reality. We can check out any time we like. Okay, it's seems a little "out there" at first. Hell, it seems positively insane, and I know it! But I also know it is absolutely real, because I have seen proof. For the last two weeks, I've been making things happen right before my eyes, just by thinking about them! Want a real clincher? I've levitated! Dreaming is not enough. You have to go a step further and use your imagination to visualize, with intent! Forget everything you've ever been taught, and believe it will happen, just as you imagined it. That is the secret. That is the mystery of life. But don't take my word for it. Watch this film for yourself, and make up your own mind. Make up your own mind. Make up your own mind... To the dull mind all nature is leaden. To the Illumined mind the whole world burns and sparkles with lights. xoxo Christine
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